In Memorium

Psst. I have a secret.

I'm actually one of those people who treats my pet like my baby.

Well...I used to...before I had my own babies.

Seven years ago in the summer of 2001 a very special pet entered my life. I was young and living in a strange city. I had moved to Philadelphia to be closer to my then-boyfriend Eric and was awkwardly living with his roommate's girlfriend. Being the introverted person I am, I rarely ventured far from his apartment or hers. Eric worked all day and I was basically on my own. I was pretty bored and very lonely. And then one day I walked into the downstairs apartment and there she was.

A white cat sitting on the counter staring me down with her penetrating blue gaze. I had never seen her before and was certain she wasn't supposed to be on our friend's counter. I hurried to safety, not entirely sure if the cat was rabid or something. The moment I found out she was a stray that had been hanging around for awhile I knew it was meant to be. Our friends had sent her back out the street (she'd sneaked in through a hole in their screen) and so I went and searched for her. She casually sauntered into my path, I scooped her up, an the rest is history.

Aurora Dawn was literally my saving grace that summer. She was a companion, someone to look after and keep me entertained. She was very entertaining. She was such a dominate personality. She harassed Eric's roommate's cats to no end. Her favorite trick was to hide up under the kitchen table on a chair...and when they would walk beneath her she would drop down on top of them and scare them to death.

When I got a job in the fall she moved with me across the street to my own apartment. Every night I would hear the bell on her collar dinging as she ran to the door to greet me. I would lay on the floor to say hi and she would roll in my hair. I doted on her. I bought her all sorts of toys. Grass in a pot to eat. A back scratcher attached to the wall (filled with catnip!), brushes, combs, etc. We even splurged and bought her a travel carrier with the top-opening lid because she hated getting into the front door of a kennel. She had just as many presents under the Christmas tree as I did, I think :-)

When Eric and I got married we moved back to WI and she came with. I actually used to wonder how I would manage when she grew old and died because she meant so much to me. She was my steadfast companion. Eric's first job of our married life was not easy, and Aurora and I spent many late nights together. Her favorite place to sleep at our first house was on the back of our couch, but inside our curtains. She would squeak every single time we poked her through the curtain. We loved it.

I read once that a cat's greatest sign of trust was to fall asleep on her belly. Aurora showed us her belly constantly, whenever she wanted some attention. Once or twice, though, she actually took a snooze while laying on her back. It made me feel so good to know she trusted us that much.

Things changed when we moved to Green Bay and I got a full-time job. She was lonely so we got her a cat to keep her company. It actually did help, although Aurora never did seem to fully appreciate our effort.

Her status changed further once kids arrived. There were so many other things to do I rarely had time to give her the attention I wanted to. I do remember one night shortly after Hannah was born where I went into the bathroom and spent a long time combing her and loving her up. I missed our connection and she gobbled up whatever she got. She'd fallen from her pedestal of "baby" and had become "pet". I remember feeling pretty badly about that.

Aurora and Hannah bonded before too long, though, and Aurora adjusted to not being the only child. It didn't take too long for Hannah and Aurora to be friends.

Aurora was a huge part of our family. She was one of our girls' first words. Both girls referred to all forms of cats as "Rora". Hannah even said that when she saw her first lion in the zoo! Both grew from newborn age loving and cuddling with their friend and playmate.

Aurora loved to lick plastic bags. I don't know why...she just did. She loved to lay on Eric's briefcase. Or suitcase. Or backpack. Or in them. She'd lay on any paper or book that might be laying on the floor. She sought out every snuggly or sunny place and camped out there. Her favorite place to "chill" was on top of my computer, and from there she would inevitably migrate to my lap. Aurora came when she was called, knew her own name, and gave me the kind of love and adoration I could never deserve. She loved to sleep with me, and if that wasn't possible, she'd sleep with Hannah. Anywhere I was, she'd most likely be. Snuggled as close as she could get. She didn't purr easy...and usually only when I gave her attention. She loved chicken fingers. One of our favorite memories is of seeing her creep beneath our glass coffee table and slyly reach up with her paw to grab a chicken finger...as if we couldn't see her through the glass! She might occasionally be caught dipping her paw in a milk glass...She loved the outdoors and ran away more times than I can remember...but she always found her way back. Even though I worried myself sick while she was gone.

Aurora will be sorely missed. She died on November 1. She was only 8 years old. I thought I had many, many more years with her. I used to wonder how I would feel when she died (imagining it to be years from this day) and I have to say, nothing in my imaginings prepared me for this. There is just something missing. Something that has been there for so long that I'd taken it for granted.

Now that she's gone I miss her in a way I didn't think possible for a mere animal. I miss her like I lost my best friend. And so it is now in her death that I find myself returning to the feeling that we started off with...I lost someone I loved like my first "baby".